December 25, 2012

It is hard to adequately state how awful it is not to have my dad her for Christmas. He is Christmas. I like the table mats and cedar logs my mom got us but it doesn't feel like Christmas at all, just she and I, hummus for dinner. I watched a bunch of Christmas love movies last night & tried to keep the pain at bay. I can't stand near the pain of losing him right now, I just have to pretend this is just some other random day.

December 22, 2012

Eric left early this am for Iowa. I couldn't drive because of my shoulder. I am seeing the aurora chorus with my mom tonight. I am very impatient with her as she is emailing me asking the time and parking situation. It is the same time it's always been, parking is the same it's always been! Not looking forward to these next few days.

December 4, 2012

Healing. Guilty about not being helpful at beacon. Just started if this then that, loving it. Worried about memorial.